With a blitz of bizarre AI memes, Trump comes to ‘save’ history
Not so long ago, Donald Trump made a twist with history, and now comes a second chance to rewrite the American story and warn gullible innocent citizens about all the ‘inaccurate information’ floating around.
So as America slept, the POTUS retired to his throne room to unleash a bizarre blitz of AI slop portraying himself and Uncle Sam as the “Guardians of the World.”
One movie-style poster depicted him as some kind of space hero called the “Cosmic Commander.” And in another, “A TIME TRAVEL EPIC,” he was pulling George Washington atop Mount Rushmore with Lincoln’s face missing — perhaps to make place for himself. “THE PAST WAS ABOUT TO CHANGE; HISTORY WAS ABOUT TO BE SAVED,” read the caption.
The meme blitz came just after he ordered the installation of warning signs outside the Smithsonian’s National Museum of American History cautioning visitors that it does not accurately reflect American history.
The signage along sidewalks and walkways leading to the museum would tell visitors about the White House report, “Saving America’s Story,” accusing Smithsonian leadership of shifting “to extreme political activism rooted in Marxism, dividing and discouraging Americans.”
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Such signs are needed, the White House suggested as “in the last decade, Americans have witnessed a concerted effort to rewrite our history and force a factually baseless ideology that discredits American heroes.”
Earlier, faced with a rapidly depleting arsenal, as jittery aides prevailed upon the commander-in-chief to hold back what a newspaper called the world’s heaviest hammer in waging peace in his Iran ‘excursion,’ he nevertheless declared victory on Truth Social.
Trump posted a picture of himself leading spooky red-eyed soldiers in the mist, another of him steering a commandeered ship in the Persian Gulf, and yet another holding an American flag and attacking an Iranian boat.
That was before the five-month long ‘excursion’ threatened to escalate into a conflagration with the U.S. and Iran firing barrages of missiles at each other and strikes spreading to Iraq, Kuwait, Saudi Arabia and Tehran digging in for “either all or nothing” despite Trump’s warning that it was “going to get a beating.”
With the war going on forever, an anonymous group of artists called the Secret Handshake which had previously installed a 10-foot-tall “Iran War Participation Trophy” mocking Trump in Washington DC, took the statue for display in New York City.
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Meanwhile, with the American economy slowing down amid an unpopular war causing an affordability crisis, Trump flew to Michigan to watch luxury cars race and blame his predecessor Joe Biden for the rising prices.
Addressing workers at a General Motors facility in Michigan, he disclosed that the White House had just ordered 250 brand new Cadillac Escalades, giant SUVs with a retail price of more than $90,000 each sans customization for security.
“We ordered 250 Escalades. That’s how we look sharp in those cavalcades, you know,” Trump beamed. “We look sharp in those Escalades. Our guys are very spoiled. They’re very spoiled. They like the Escalade. So do I.”
And as his team curiously missed the deadline to request a rehearing of the Supreme Court case that knocked down Trump’s order ending birthright citizenship, a law that makes anyone born on U.S. soil a citizen — he piled on the apex court.
“Does anybody have any idea how much Money and Prestige the United States Supreme Court has cost our Nation with their negative Rulings on Birthright Citizenship and TARIFFS?” he asked with “The answer, TRILLIONS AND TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS!”
But a Wisconsin brewery whose owner once promised to give away free beer if Trump dies is set to lose its alcohol permit Aug. 4 for allegedly transporting canned beer from Illinois without the required permits and taxes.
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Revocation of the permit comes about three months after FBI agents grilled the brewery owner Kirk Bangstad over a Facebook post apparently referring to an alleged assassination attempt against Trump following the White House Correspondents’ abandoned dinner on April 25.
“Well, we almost got #freebeerday. Either a brother or sister in the Resistance needs to work on their marksmanship or he faked another assassination to get a positive news cycle,” Bangstad wrote from the brewery’s account.
Meanwhile, construction of Trump’s $400 million 90,000-square-foot big beautiful ballroom and bunker complex to make way for which he demolished the historic East Wing, is racing ahead despite unresolved legal challenges with a federal judge barring construction over ground.
And the State Department announced it will be offering more passports bearing Trump’s picture due to “overwhelming demand.” The design was introduced to commemorate America’s 250th anniversary on July 4, with plans to produce it in limited quantities.
The builder-in-chief himself was excited to announce a massive, $22.5 billion overhaul of Dulles International Airport, the capital’s air travel hub with direct flights to more than 50 countries.
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“This is very exciting to me as a builder — somebody that builds lots of big, nice projects before I got here, and we’re doing some of the best in the world right now,” Trump said in the Oval Office, seated before a large model of the newly imagined airport that covered his desk.
The “HISTORIC investment for a landmark transformation” calls for new terminals, gold decor and an end to the airport’s iconic “mobile lounges” known as “people movers.” Trump, who called Dulles “a terrible place to be,” is said to have personally edited the plans.
“You know, it’s a great thrill,” Trump said when asked why he’s so focused on making Washington beautiful again, “Whether you’re a Republican or Democrat, you don’t want to go and be subjected to this airport.”
If Trump is still around for his third or fourth term when the new improved airport gets ready in eight to 10 years, it would in all certainty be renamed “DJT” — Greeting visitors with a sign: ‘Welcome to 1984!’ Just kidding.